Never bloodless

After an experience this week, I am yet again reminded that theology is never bloodless.  Blood…why blood? Simply because you don’t just bleed from physical wounds but from emotional and mental wounds as well.

Twenty five years ago, as a 15 year old, I walked into my first church. If I knew then, what I know now, I would have run screaming for the hills.  I have seen some of the most nasty, self centred, holier than though, social climbing twits. I have seen manipulative, hollow people, only wanting folk when they are following their agenda. I have seen elitist, prideful people who will stab you in the back,  faster than lightening.

Many times I have brought to my knees in tears because of the actions of folk. And many times, the heavens are silent. You see, you don’t always come away with comfort. Sometimes you come away just as tired as when you knelt. Sometimes…more often than not, the ceiling doesn’t move and prayer doesn’t feel like it’s leaving the room. That though is the reality. Friends become strangers, distance grows, then some turn on you and others ostracise you.  Life is perfectly reflected in religion but religious bonds or so called links have a tendency to magnify the emotions to, at times, magnitudes that fly out into the solar system.

Its at this point, most folk decide the what is asked is too much. At times…yes, it does feel like too much. Why is a favourite phrase of mine but somewhere, a friend says hi, posts the goofy cat or dog picture that you so need, in that moment, or says morning hun, hugs. In that moment, for just a second, the world slows just enough so you catch your breath. Drag yourself off your knees and start again. So to C, Y, A and K, thank you. The four of you have kept me centred and sane as the swirls of Grad school and theology masters degree, have howled around. To C,  who gently holds my heart in his hands and at the same time, lovingly kicks me up the backside. To Y, my non blood sis and fellow undergrad theology surviver, that cheers and makes me think. To A who always makes me think when she posts. To K who came out of nowhere and has opened up the way so I can go home. Thank you.

To those who are not as close anymore but taught vital lessons along the way, thank you also. I would not be in grad school without you.

So time to move forward!

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Take the bite out of terror.

After a further break and some thought, I decided to come out of silence and start posting again. Why, like a lot of folk, I am tired of seeing what is going on in the world and by staying silent, that only feeds into the vortex that is already spinning.

So, lets get blunt, terrorism does not give a crap about what you believe, how you act etc.  Terrorism is simply a set of actions that completely and utterly disregard life.  Full stop.

Human life still counts.  I do not care if society disagrees.  Stuff society.  Each person has value. The world as a whole, is enriched by each life that come into it. Each life that passes from it, lessens the world.  That is why when an act of terrorism happens, folk are so shocked.  In that moment, folks remember that life has real value.  It is easy to loose sight of that between running off to work, paying the bills and just living the every day grind, that life is for some.  The thing is though, even in that grind, life is has value.

It is truly time that humanity woke the heck up. Terrorism wants to polarise and its doing a very good job of it.  So maybe its time we fight back.  Maybe its time to introduce you to Mo and Flo.  Mo works as a carpenter and Flo is a stay at home mum.  They have three kids, two in high school and one in upper primary.  Normal family with a normal life.  Bills to play.  Love the footy, go out as a family, see their friends and they contribute to the community.  The only thing that might take someone aback is that Mo and Flo are Muslims.  And its this point where the polarisation sets in.  You see, your were with me, right up until, I used the M word.  Well guess what….that folks is how the terrorists win.

Picking on race or religion has no impact on terrorism.  It was not all that long ago, when another group of folk, were driven from pillar to post and blamed for everything that goes wrong.  Those folk ended up a target in a war and were killed on a scale, that the world had not seen, until that time.  The world promised itself that it would never happen again. There is still much work that has to be done removing anti-Jewish sentiment.  Adding another group into similar sentiment, shows that the world hasn’t learned from its history. Its time, right now, that the world as a whole, stands up, and keeps that promise.

Terrorism wins if it divides us.  What unites us, is far stronger than what divides us.  You don’t understand what Mo and Flo believe, then learn about it.  You don’t have to agree but you do owe it to yourself, to educate yourself.  Read about history, learn from it. Abram and Anna, further down the road, happen to be close friends of Mo and Flo.  Just because Mo and Flo are Muslim and Abram and Anna are Jewish didn’t stop them from valuing that which unites them.  They spent time learning about each other.  Their sons are on the footy team together.  What they did is make a conscious choice to step outside of the hype and not be sucked down by it.  Read about Abram and Anna’s history as well.  Look at the similarity in what is happening in the world now, and what was happening in pre-WW2.

Then make the choice to build bridges and reinforce foundations. As people we can outrun the terrorists.  We have the ability to do that.  Each person that educates themself, is one less a person caught in that vortex.  The more that step out of that vortex and see it for what it is, then guess what, we slow it down and then it spins slower and has less impact.  Eventually, it stops spinning and all you find in it, are a group of people, who can’t suck the rest of us in.  Then what do you see, you see criminals that have no regard for the lives of others and you have them placed before a judge and put where they cannot harm others.

That is it….you see them for what they are, criminals.  Not terrorists, not something highly emotionally charged.  Human beings for whatever reason, have chosen to stop seeing the value of other persons lives.  As a society, we know what to do with murders, we jail them and make sure they can’t hurt others.  So lets take apart the hype and by doing that, lets take the power away from the terrorists and put it back into our hands.


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Back after a break

Ah spiritual crisis; the fuel for inner growth and contemplation.  Also a way of saying that this blog is being rebooted.  Its been two years since my last post and that is two years, too long.

So expect to see some movement here in the coming weeks as the Mad one is back!

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Pope Benedict, my take on it.

Well the media and people are swirling about Pope Benedict resigning. The thing is while he and his actions can be labeled in many ways, only those who know him well really know what may or may not be going through his head.

As I said a little while ago in a forum.  He is human.  Under the robes, crosses etc he is still a living, breathing, human being. I don’t know what burdens he carries.  How much sleep he loses, how many prayers he cries through. How much pain he feels in his heart.

It takes real guts to say, you know what, I can’t do this anymore. It shows that he wasn’t all that interested in the power and prestige that comes with the title, pope.

For whatever he did in his life or didn’t do about Nazi’s, child abuse, money etc….at this end of his life, he chose to make a choice to step out and let someone who hopefully will be stronger, take the burden.

Respect him for knowing himself well enough to know that he could not do it.  Respect him for knowing the right time for him to go, for him.

Pray that the next Pope will be strong enough to tackle the problems within the faith.

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New year, new directions.

Well readers, I am back after finishing my theology degree and having thyroid surgery.  Having had a number of unpleasant experiences while away particularly from the theological and spiritual area, this has brought about a change in me that while I feel its for the better, some may not agree.

Please note the following.  This blog is being written by a graduate of an interdenominational theology degree.  The words expressed will NOT always express what the writer believes.  The writer has learned, the painful way, that the  best place for ones spiritual life is offline and hidden from view.

As such, expect the unexpected.  Do not expect perfect orthodoxy.  Expect not only heterodoxy but out and out heresy at times.  Do not think that Christianity will be the only the target, if its a religion, its a target.

I will back my words with searchable academic sources and I welcome discussion and argument, so long as you can back your words also.

Please keep your personal gnosis out of my comments.  I’m sorry but unless the Being your referring to, has told me the exact same thing, the last time He/She/It sat on my shoulder and talked to me, don’t expect me to agree or and don’t expect me to be graceful for that matter.  Also for those who are charismatic and read this blog, that goes for your revelations also.

This blog is written by someone who recognizes all five sees as having equal authority.   Someone who is pro-ordination of women, pro-contraception when keeping ones legs closed is for whatever reason not an option and when the life of the mother is in danger, pro-abortion also.

I think that covers the house keeping issues.

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ending and beginnings.

All going well this is my last 11 days as a theology undergrad.  All I have to do is pass and that is it but does finishing a formal theology degree mean that I stop doing theology, heavens no, its only just now beginning and that is the new purpose of this blog.

This blog becomes theology central for me.  What I am studying or reading will become commented on, pulled apart and those thoughts will end up here.  So get ready only 11 days left before this blog takes off!

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New home of a mad benedictine

This is the new home of the Mad Benedictine and its time to handle a few housekeeping issues.

For those who read my other blog over on blogger will know that mixed signals have been coming out and will continue to be, if only to continue the peace and quiet I have now.

Why, I am tired of catholic basing, being not catholic enough etc

I am  mature women in my mid 30’s and I have learned that people don’t seem to be able to confidences without speaking behind ones back. I am tired of people thinking that their opinions on religion are the only valid ones.  I am also tired…just simply tired.  I have learned that certain battles should be fort and some left alone.  Which is why and yes I am confirming this rumour, I am giving serious thought to move to the autocepholous movement.  No wars, no holy than thou…simply living as children of God with the cr&p.

So hold on cause final year theology will be on the way from here.


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